[And it is sort of unfair that Rita took the blame for it. But also. . . ]
I suppose there is no way to tell her we know without telling her how Taichi, you, and myself were eliminated as suspects. But I hate to think of her continuing on alone.
I already told her that - hmm. I couched it, I pretended I had had the same conversation with you and Taichi. But I told her that I was worried.
[Still, he can't disagree with the assessment. That's probably why he likes Luxanna so much. She's a miserable, lying regret wizard pretending to be a paladin.]
I think she was honestly angry at Alphinaud, at being blinded. Given her history, having to hide these secrets and being treated with anger and suspicion for it is probably very difficult for her. But once others began to get angry with her, she changed her mind, started trying to protect Otome.
... Yeah. It was probably both. [ because he's right, she was probably being petty for real. yamato confronted her for a reason. still. ] I don't know what to do anymore.
[ killing byleth made sense at the time, but with the new information... and it's not like he'd ever wanted to go through with any of them. so lux? otome? he doesn't know. ]
[There's some conflict in him, too. He is sympathetic to both of them. He would feel less sympathetic if they killed someone he cared for too much to lose.]
. . . Let me say this. And don't - Beauregard would dislike me saying this, although she could confirm its accuracy easily enough. [He hesitates, and there's some uncertainty, but then his feelings abruptly go fairly blank, straightforward.] If someone unfortunate needs to be killed, I am probably the right person to carry it out. It doesn't weigh on me the way it does on most people. It isn't something I enjoy or am proud of, but it is the truth.
[What a cool thing to say! Anyway.]
But my personal opinion is that killing the people in that group won't do us any good.
[ yamato's ... clearly uncomfortable, although whether it's the subject or how easily caleb shut his feelings off is hard to say. ]
So what? We just... let them keep doing it?
[ it's not like he wants them dead, but it feels a lot like trading lives. he's been lucky that they haven't targeted someone he wouldn't have been able to stand, and he's not willing to risk that again. ]
If I had some guarantee it would help matters rather than increase the body count, I'd feel otherwise.
[But no, it's not a great solution.]
If there's something they're accomplishing through this that this world wants to happen, we need to understand what it is. Otherwise, we risk killing them only to have them replaced.
... So what? We leave them to have to keep killing and send them off to expulsion, in the hopes we figure it out?
[ he says that angrily, but there's just a kind of despair in his feelings because he kind of agrees and he hates it? he hates agreeing! he hates either option actually!!! ]
[He's quiet for a moment, his feelings a little nervous, uncomfortable, because he doesn't know how to put it.]
But it's not about danger for me, not exactly. I'm pretty confident in our ability to carry it off. But. . . you know, fighting against someone who is attacking you, putting you in danger, fighting back. . . that's a very different thing than hunting someone down with a friendly face and executing them.
It ruins you a little, doing something like this. And I dislike seeing young people who are smart and talented have their futures stolen away from them in this way, the way mine was. So that is something important to me.
[ yamato's mostly feeling unsure and concerned, hit with that information about caleb's backstory, but what really gives him pause is when caleb talks about the future and he looks away with a frown for a while.
their future, huh. ]
... I don't know if having it be a placed hit is any better. [ he'll point it out, quiet, but: ] But... alright. If it comes down to that again, I'll ask.
[ it's reluctant and uncertain still, but he doesn't seem to be lying. ]
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[And it is sort of unfair that Rita took the blame for it. But also. . . ]
I suppose there is no way to tell her we know without telling her how Taichi, you, and myself were eliminated as suspects. But I hate to think of her continuing on alone.
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[ sometimes you are very close to someone and it's tragic, actually. ]
I don't know. I think she wanted to get caught, instead of Yanagiya-san.
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[Still, he can't disagree with the assessment. That's probably why he likes Luxanna so much. She's a miserable, lying regret wizard pretending to be a paladin.]
I think she was honestly angry at Alphinaud, at being blinded. Given her history, having to hide these secrets and being treated with anger and suspicion for it is probably very difficult for her. But once others began to get angry with her, she changed her mind, started trying to protect Otome.
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[ killing byleth made sense at the time, but with the new information... and it's not like he'd ever wanted to go through with any of them. so lux? otome? he doesn't know. ]
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. . . Let me say this. And don't - Beauregard would dislike me saying this, although she could confirm its accuracy easily enough. [He hesitates, and there's some uncertainty, but then his feelings abruptly go fairly blank, straightforward.] If someone unfortunate needs to be killed, I am probably the right person to carry it out. It doesn't weigh on me the way it does on most people. It isn't something I enjoy or am proud of, but it is the truth.
[What a cool thing to say! Anyway.]
But my personal opinion is that killing the people in that group won't do us any good.
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So what? We just... let them keep doing it?
[ it's not like he wants them dead, but it feels a lot like trading lives. he's been lucky that they haven't targeted someone he wouldn't have been able to stand, and he's not willing to risk that again. ]
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If I had some guarantee it would help matters rather than increase the body count, I'd feel otherwise.
[But no, it's not a great solution.]
If there's something they're accomplishing through this that this world wants to happen, we need to understand what it is. Otherwise, we risk killing them only to have them replaced.
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[ he says that angrily, but there's just a kind of despair in his feelings because he kind of agrees and he hates it? he hates agreeing! he hates either option actually!!! ]
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[Feelings are back, remember feelings? He feels an echo of some of that despair and heartbreak, but he also feels a little sad for him.]
There will be more death and pain for as long as this continues on. There's no answer that has us putting an end to it neatly.
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I know that. [ it's snapped, and he holds onto himself for a second ] ... I know that. But if there's a way to minimize the losses, at least...
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That's exactly what we must do. Minimize the losses wherever we can.
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... I don't want to put you guys in danger, either.
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[He's quiet for a moment, his feelings a little nervous, uncomfortable, because he doesn't know how to put it.]
But it's not about danger for me, not exactly. I'm pretty confident in our ability to carry it off. But. . . you know, fighting against someone who is attacking you, putting you in danger, fighting back. . . that's a very different thing than hunting someone down with a friendly face and executing them.
It ruins you a little, doing something like this. And I dislike seeing young people who are smart and talented have their futures stolen away from them in this way, the way mine was. So that is something important to me.
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their future, huh. ]
... I don't know if having it be a placed hit is any better. [ he'll point it out, quiet, but: ] But... alright. If it comes down to that again, I'll ask.
[ it's reluctant and uncertain still, but he doesn't seem to be lying. ]
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[He nods, relieved. He thinks Yamato is capable enough, but hunting down someone like Byleth or Otome, let alone Luxanna. . . ]
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guilt at feeling relief this is a terrible week ]
I know. I just. I don't like it.
[ an understatement ! ]